The gold standard for keeping baby quiet

The central contradiction of parenthood?  Mummy and Daddy can’t wait for their adorable newborn to make sounds. Then when it does, they can’t wait for the darling little bundle to shut the hell up.

Mathis Riiber, CEO of fashion forward kiddie empire Ulubulu, can’t solve that particular conundrum (who can?) but he can make keeping junior quiet and content an exercise in style: the sort of style that has the charming extra bonus of making other parents simply pea green with envy.

“Our baby pacifier comes in 14k European white gold and features over 278 pave cut white diamonds totalling 3 carats” Riiber says, fresh back from a morning race with his son. “We do customise, of course. We can engrave baby’s name, date of birth and birth weight. If you want pink diamonds for girl or blue for a boy, we can accommodate that. We did customise for our most recent sale, which was to Asia.”

Beats the traditional silver spoon.

The US $17,000 (HK$209,259/169,975 RMB) cost hasn’t been an obstacle to the Hollywood and Hip Hop set who think baby needs bling too, but Riiber says ‘regular Moms’ purchase regularly, too. “It’s a fabulous keepsake, an heirloom that can passed on, and that bit different from, oh, bronzed booties.” Perfect for snapshots to impress and stun family and friends, Riiber wouldn’t recommend the pacifier for daily use, though: “It might have a moving handle, but it’s a replica of a real pacifier, really.”

And if infant saliva does to precious metals what it does to D&G silk jackets…

…More stories like this are available in Quintessentially Asia.